Ninotchka

I was destructive enough in my last post so, today I decided I’d let the constructive half of my personality write a post! Thank heavens that I'm a multiple personality!

So, this time - ONE SKEIN PHASE – THE ULTIMATE CHALLENGE
Or ONE-SKEIN MARATHON.

How can you have a marathon with such limited resources? You can if you try to make as many garments as possible from a single skein! A 50 g skein!

This is how the story begins- about a month ago, I managed to “kill” my last functional tapestry needle and had to buy a new set. The tapestry needles are sold in a yarn shop. And there’s plenty of yarn in a yarn shop (as you can imagine)! And this knitter is not allowed to buy any more yarn this winter unless SHE intends to eat it. So, I tied my hands and took a few friends with me (heavy weight category friends - who could easily «remove me from the shelf» if necessary) and off to tapestry needles shopping we went. Why didn't I simply leave my credit cards at home? Well, obviously because the nice lady in my favourite yarn shop is very cool and she wouldn't mind waiting a day or two to get the money (she is quite useless, isn’t she ?!!!).
I was cool in there but I did let two or three people to go in front of me so that I could look around a bit (looking is free!!!) and just when I was about to pay for my needles, I saw a skein of pale grey yarn on the floor. My clumsiness, again. But, there wasn't a single yarn in the same colour on the shelf so I had to ask the shop owner where to put it! She said- «Oh, just leave it anywhere, it's the last one, anyway!» . Suddenly, my eyes were THIS big!!!! I was looking at that skein in my hand… the skein was smiling back at me....it was an instant attraction! YOU'RE MINE!!!!
I didn't care that it was grey… I didn’t know what it was made of… nothing! The adrenaline was already pumping! The great thing about this «ultimate challenge» was that – there really was only ONE skein. No more in the shop, or in my home…the only skein in town! Now- that is a REAL one-skein project! What a thrill!

I mean- I could go bungee- jumping but...what's the point? I can always ask that nice lady to call me when she finds another «last skein» in her shop!

OK- so, the next thing to do was to examine the characteristics of the yarn and decide what to do with it. Not a brilliant situation, at all! Pure acrylic (no wonder no one wanted the poor one)! How do they make pure acrylic yarn, anyway? Do they spin it like wool? I can't even imagine it on a spinning wheel- the first thing that comes to my mind when I hear the word «acrylic», is a beautiful painting. I like acrylic paintings!
But, it didn't really matter it was 100% unnatural, after all. It was yet another challenge- what can be made from a SINGLE skein of ACRYLIC yarn? It's not really skin-friendly so gloves were out of the question. A hat- same problem! And there was absolutely not enough yarn for a scarf or a wrap....I didn't need a pale grey purse (though- I did think of Norah Gaughan’s modular purses)...BUT, it's the turtleneck time and I love turtlenecks. I always wear them in January. If I make a neck warmer- it will basically never touch my skin and there's plenty of yarn for one in this skein. (Finally, it was all about the excitement of making something- I'll probably give it as a gift to someone later)!

I knew I should use an «economical» pattern but eyelet-holes didn’t seem like a good choice for a neck warmer! I needed something slip-stich-ish! k1, s1 wyif – bingo! Knitting only every second stitch in odd numbered rows spares a lot of yarn.
So, this is how this process looked like...

It was a sport-ish yarn, about 11wpi and 5mm needles seemed like the best choice. The result -puffy but not too loose! I got the gauge of 17 sts / 17rows=10 cm(4inches) – just what I wanted – and there was no need to cast on more than 28 stitches (I was thinking of working with 30 but...adding these two extra stitches was just calling for a trouble!). 70 rows and it was almost 0.5 m (20 inches) long- enough! Bind off, break the yarn!

So far, it looked good. Only a bit pale-ish! This called for some extra contrasting yarn! (Is using additional yarn in the «ultimate one-skein project» called cheating??? Oh, please say it isn't because I won't look smart anymore! It's just for decoration!). I found some leftovers from my Buttony cardigan and I believe it was just the best choice- another grey only now charcoal yarn. This yarn is, actually, way thicker than the pale one and not really a material for an I-cord but, it was either that or a dull one-colour neck warmer! A 4sts (3+1sts) and about 90cm (35 inches) long I-cord was all I needed to get rid of that dullness! And I think it worked! It's a funny thing, the I-cord, I mean- just compare the pictures of the neck warmer before and after the I-cord has been attached- it suddenly looks so classy!
I have recently been looking at some pictures in «Knitting on the Edge» and «Knitting Beyond the Edge» and that is exactly where I think the I-cord idea came from so, I gave this garment a working title «On the Edge Neck Warmer». But when it was finished, that shape looked somehow familiar!

Do you know what it reminded me of? THIS!

Remember this silly hat Greta Garbo wore in “Ninotchka” ? (You haven't seen Ninotchka??? I won't even comment that! :))) ) . It was, definitely, a Ninotchka neck warmer!!!

But, the excitement continues! After finishing the neck warmer, there was only 1/3 of my magical skein left. Though it looks much bigger in the picture, it was a very skinny skein at this point.

Once again - millions of ideas and millions of «NO-s!» Luckily, I had another «On the Edge strike of inspiration"! Wrist Cuffs! (I don't think I like the sound of this – please, bare in mind, this is a nice place!). I'll make decorative cuffs! Quite a useless garment, of course, but it's not as though I had a lot of options with only 1/3 of a skein left. And they can look quite cool.

But, before starting- the skein had to be divided into two equal balls (otherwise, I might have ended up with only one cuff)! I used 6mm needles this time (just in any case) and only 20 stitches. Three rows of 1p,1k ribbing and then the «neck-warmer» pattern again. 10 cm (4inches) for the knitted part plus the additional 2cm (1inch) long crocheted edging seemed like a reasonable length for a cuff (or height, depending of your point of view!). I didn't work in circle because, I CO the minimal number of stitches and wasn't sure if it would actually fit my hand in the end. In case it didn’t, I would have had to make an insertion (made from a different yarn). Luckily, there was no need for that so I just seamed the edges of that block together. Barely! See this "almost a-yarn-tail something" inside the red circle???

That's the yarn tail after finishing the first cuff! And look at the length of the CO tail! My CO tails are usually ten times longer but working on an ultimate-challenge project can really turn your perception upside-down, can't it? It seemed like such a waste of yarn!
I, didn't have to break the yarn this time, of course! :))) (Did you know that a grey acrylic yarn - literally - turns green when it starts burning? I knew there was something extraterrestrial about that yarn the moment I saw it on the floor!)

An extra edging made from the "I-cord yarn" and a mini flower and my first cuff was finished. I wanted a pale grey spot in the middle of this flower but at this point I was really working with micro pieces of yarn.

The good thing was- I knew that there was still just enough yarn for the second cuff.

And, here it is- the ultimate 'Ninotchka neck warmer and wrist cuffs’ set!

Though, that Ninotchka hat was probably not grey at all! It was the film that was made in b&w technology! Doesn't really matter- I'll turn my Ninotchka into b&w too! No problem!

I quite like the fact that this neck warmer resembles this hat, actually. But- I didn’t know it was going to happen so, I think I should now start paying more attention to what I do. Especially if I decide to make a dress! I’d be in a huge problem if it would turn out to look like THIS ONE!

You can download the 'Ninotchka' neck warmer pattern form HERE!

A WOOOOOORM !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I HAVE JUST FOUND A WORM IN MY YARN! THERE IS A WORM INSIDE ONE SKEIN OF YARN IN MY BASKET! A REAL WORM...SITTING IN MY PURE COTTON PINK TWISTER YARN! A WORM!!!! IN MY YARN!!! WHITE WORM! PINK YARN!!!!

DO I SOUND AS THOUGH I'M FREAKING OUT?? THAT’S BECAUSE I AM!!!!!!!!

And, NO, I won't turn off the CAPS LOCK because I'm still screaming!!!!!


Why did I have to find a WORM in my yarn? I don't know anyone who has ever found a WORM in a skein of yarn! I don't know anyone who actually has any yarn at home but that doesn't change the fact that there are no evidences of a WORM living in a skein of yarn besides this one, DOES IT????!
Since when do WORMS like cotton yarn? Do they like cotton? What could they possibly do with it? WHAT WAS HE DOING THERE????? Was he eating it? Or wearing it? He can't wear a skein of yarn before I knit it, how stupid can he be? DOES HE, MAYBE, THINK HE IS A SILKWORM???? A COCOON? OOOOHHHHH, great- not only have I found a WORM in my yarn but HE is also schizophrenic!!!! A maniac !!!! May I just say he was completely naked when I found HIM??? Exposing himself like that in front of an innocent, fine young lady (ME) like that ?!!!?!!!?!!?!!!!!?!!!!!!

And how the hack did he get in there????? I know, he probably got there 4 months ago when I had to leave the basket with that skein out on my balcony for a few days but:

FIRST OF ALL: I live on the 8th floor and, there are no WORMS up here. There has never been a single WORM here. Plus, the basket was on a very high shelf- how did he manage to climb up there in just 3 days? Since when does a WORM walk so swiftly??? Did HE drop out of a plane??? Into my yarn????????????
SECOND (OF ALL) : I don't live on the 8th floor- I don't even know that much any more! I I live on the 6th floor. I think! Well, it's high, anyway!!!!
THIRD: that basket has been inside the house since then!!!! How did he manage to survive? Do worms like heated houses? Or is HE some kind of a freak. A WARM WORM or something like that???? Does he have a family???? (I don't recall anyone paying the rent recently!!!!)
FOURTH( I guess): How long do they live?????

YAYCKSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!

And how should I take this- as a massage? Why did it have to happen to me of all people????? Is it something like when you find a worm in an apple? «If it's good for a worm than it is certainly good for a man»! Is that it? Is this because I've been refusing to use this yarn for more than two years and because I'm still angry with myself for choosing pink over burgundy??? Is that what this is about? Is HE suggesting that PINK was a better choice after all??? WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS??????? A fashion adviser ????? I don't need some WORM to tell me which colour looks better on me!!!!!!!!

I threw that skein out on the balcony! I had to take a walk. Or shoot myself.
Someone found it outside while I was away. And decided to put it back into my room! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!


It's outside again! They're both outside. That WORM and his skein. He can have it. I don't want it anymore. He can eat it, if he wants to! He can wear it! He can knit it...I couldn’t care less! I'll even give him two needles!


AND, N.O., I DIDN'T TAKE ANY PHOTOS!!! Do you want to know what it looked like- find a picture of a WORM on the Internet and than take a picture of a skein of yarn. Now open your Photoshop and blend these two pictures together! You think it looks weird??? Well, you bet it is weird!!!

I HATE THAT WORM! And now all sorts of animals protection organizations will be after me for saying this and expressing my hostility towards animals! Really???? WELL, WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO- TO TAKE A WORM WHO THINKS HE IS A SILKWORM TO A PSYCHIATRIST??? To pay for HIS therapy??? Do you think writing this makes me happy? I wanted this blog to be a place for constructive thoughts and now I am forced to publish a severely destructive post that will probably be labelled as politically incorrect!!! Well, mind you- I LOVE ANIMALS! I love dogs! Tigers! Bears! Penguins... And I would LOVE to find a penguin in one of my baskets some day! I'd even make him a nice scarf! I'd let him pick the yarn he likes! Adopt him! Feed him! Oh, but, NOOOO- I had to find a WORM! I never get what I want, do I?

YAYCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

............

End of transmission!

Gloveless tradition (or Story about a silly lumberjack)

I make gloves! Yes, I do! Or, to be more precise, I have recently started making them! Not that I thought I would but I did! So far I have already made a few pairs and I think it is just the beginning of a new passion. And, each time I discover a new passion and start making a garment I had never made before, I try to learn as many facts about it as possible; where does it come from?; are there any special techniques?; how do people in other countries and on other continents make it?; do they still make it?;...Finally, I like to learn everything there is to know about how my ancestors used to make it so that, hopefully, one day I could do a little «homage» to my tradition by making one, obeying to the rules set by masters from the past. It rarely happens, though, because, living in Slavic / Mediterranean cultural environment that has experienced some strong influences from the Oriental countries in the past and with my origins being Slavic– traditional knitting in my case generally means: a world of stunning stranded colour-work and amazing ornaments. And me- I'm just not that type of knitter so, I usually end up admiring other people's work and making a pattern of my own.

This time, before starting my new “traditional gloves investigation", I knew that, during my search, just like any other time, I'd pretty much come across zillions and zillions of motley pieces and breathtaking colour patterns but little did I know that I wasn't going to find a single GLOVE! The one with fingers, I mean! A real glove! No, not a single pair! Mittens? Yes! Mitts? Yes? Wrist-warmers? Yes! Gloves? NO! Why? I haven’t got the slightest idea! Apparently, my ancestors did not make gloves (I’m devastated)!

And what bothers me the most is that this culture is widely known for its knitting. In the old days, people would spend days and days trying to make a new pattern or figure out another master’s technique constantly, competing with each other; making sure their unfinished works are well hidden when another knitter comes to visit; accusing each other of stealing secret patterns; knitting these tiny and perfectly even stitches until they start feeling cramps in their fingers or until it is too dark to see… spending hours and days of their lives knitting and thinking about knitting and yet...no one has ever made a glove!
Pretty Slavic, if you ask me! Accidental genius...beauty above practicality! Yap, “I’d rather work barehanded in the middle of January than make gloves with fingers if my intarsia pattern can not fit into that shape!”

Ever since that disturbing discovery, I've been going back to that story over and over again, desperately and unsuccessfully trying to find excuses and explanations. And each time I'd think about it, the same story would unfold in front of my eyes- about hundred years ago, a man wakes up just before dawn in his home high up in a mountain and starts getting ready to go to work. Maybe he is a lumberjack...Yes, he is a lumberjack and he'll be spending the next ten or so hours working hard in a forest.

Just before leaving his home, he must build the fire so that the house would be worm when his children wake up. And by the hearth- he finds a new pair of beautiful mittens his wife had left him. The last time he saw her knitting them, the evening before, she was still working on the first glove; she must have knitted the night away so that she could finish them before he wakes up. Do I need to mention how beautiful they are?? She is the best mitten maker in their area; widely known for her amazing patterns and secret cast-on method no one else knows how to make!




He puts his new mittens on his rough hands and leaves the house. He is heading towards the forest, walking impatiently and looking forward to meeting his “fellows”.
As soon as he notices them from the distance, he'll start waving at them, talking loudly and vigorously gesturing while pointing into a direction where he thinks "a wolf might be hiding as he speaks". But no one will look into that direction because, the moment they see him coming, they’ll know- there’s no wolf- it’s a new pair of mittens on his hands he wants them to see. And they’ll know he'll continue making jokes and loudly greeting each one of them until he is sure everyone has seen the beauty on his hands . Then he'll proudly take his new mittens off and start working. Just the thought of them inside his pockets will be enough to worm up his bare hands for the rest of the day. The others will silently watch him make his theatrical gestures while secretly admiring his lady' work. Oh, they're all wearing beautiful mittens made by their wives, their mothers and sisters,of course they are-but they well know that what his wife can make is hardly just a pair of mittens- it’s a rare pair of identical miracles no mittens can compete with.

Did you spot anything unusual in this story? Let me "rewind" this sentence: "Then he'll proudly take them off and start working. " HE WILL, ACTUALLY, TAKE THEM OFF WHEN HE MOST NEEDS HIS HANDS TO BE WORM. He can’t work with his hands “wrapped” inside the mitten- he needs his fingers to be free!!! Free(zing)!!!!

Now, I don't know how this story ends but my lumberjack will most likely go back home in the evening, thank his wife for that pair of mittens and probably peek into her knitting basket to see the beginning of a new miracle. Maybe this time it’s a pair of socks! For him!
What I don't understand about that evening hundred years ago, is this- when our lumberjack did get home from work– WHY, ON EARTH, DIDN’T HE TELL HIS WIFE: “M'am, I think we need to invent some fingers for these mittens! I could really use a few more! Maybe we could call them gloves!?» If he had only said that, he might have saved our tradition from being glove-less and make me a very proud person. But he didn't! And, I don't know why! Maybe he was worried of what other people might have said if he had shown up one day wearing these funny garments and with a separate coat for each finger on his hand!? Perhaps...or maybe there’s another explanation I just can’t seem to be able to think of! Hopefully, someone will explain this to me one day!

OK, so, now that I'm short on pictures of traditional gloves, I'll just have to show you my works! I have already mentioned the first Lollipop convertible pair of gloves for my sister and here’s what I’ve made since the beginning of December.:



Mermaid gloves for my friend Sunny. I had a real hard time deciding what kind of present to make for her since her style is very casual! She hates «girlish» colours and I can bet that she could just as easily label a stitch pattern as "girlish" , too. But, she is also a painter and a great hand-made-gift target! So, I decided to make her a pair of fingerless gloves (original enough for her taste), use a geometrical pattern (she is a very geometrical type of person) and to use dark green yarn (it goes well with her style yet it's not as boring as a pair of black gloves). I just love this Mermaid pattern!


And, having said that- I decided I’d make another pair, only now in grey and on smaller needles (2,5cm instead of 3,5cm like for the first pair). After finishing them, I had to make another pair for my sister (a promise is a promise) and, after seeing my Mermaid gloves, she decided she'd like something similar only glove-shaped. At that point I really needed a break from Pomotamus stitch pattern (not that I didn’t enjoy working on it but still...) and so I decided to use a similar “slanting shells” pattern which, I think, works better for this type of gloves.




I really liked how they turned out but my sister wanted a pink bow! A pink what??? I thought they looked just fine as they were but- "We can take special orders according to customers' request", and so - a pink bow on Pagliacci gloves it is! (It took me more time to make that bow than to knit the rest of the glove...)




And there's another pair of gloves waiting for me to finish them. But I don't think I will. They look awful! Guess who I’m making these for- me, of course. My hands are perfectly disciplined when they’re making gloves for other people’s hands but when I want to make a cool pair of gloves for them, they decide to turn my work into a disaster. They're even more stupid than that lumberjack from my story!